Forgiveness Matters: Luke 17. 1-10
We’re focussing today on the whole subject of “Forgiveness.” Because Forgiveness Matters - both in the area of our personal lives & relationships and in the life of the church. In a short, and random-looking collection of short teachings, Jesus insists, “you must forgive” your brother when he repents. He says it twice, and in fact he uses two different ways of giving the command in verse 3 and 4, to emphasise the point.
Why does it matter?
Let’s check out what the Bible says in other places…
When we pray the Lord's Prayer, we say "forgive us as we forgive". So if we don't forgive we are in effect saying to God, “don't forgive us our sins". And if we only forgive others the sins they are aware of and are prepared to say "sorry" for we're in affect saying to God, "only forgive us for the sins we know we've committed."
Jesus tells the story of an unforgiving servant... because his disciples asked how often they had to keep forgiving. “One servant owes his boss millions, and is forgiven when he can't pay. But then he catches up with another servant who owes a few thousand: only a fraction of what the first servant owed the boss. So the first servant grabs the second by the throat, and threatens to sue him. When the boss hears what the first Servant has done, he ‘uncancels’ his debt and locks him up until he pays back what he owes”. And Jesus says "That's how God will respond if you don''t forgive each other". We're saved by God's grace alone! But we've saved by a grace that transforms us: no transformation, no grace, no salvation. (See Romans 3. 28: “We are made right with God through faith and not by obeying the law” and 30 “only when we have faith do we truly fulfil the law.”)
2 Cor 2. 10-11. Sometimes, in the context of Church discipline we need to tell someone what they are doing is not right. In that context, Paul says “What you forgive, I forgive … in the sight of Christ, so that Satan may not take advantage of us or defraud us! Dividing the Church; bringing despair to the man who had offended and cultivating bitterness or resentment in the hearts of those who don’t forgive, gives Satan the upper hand, and defrauds us both as individuals and as a community in Christ.
So unforgiveness is the easiest way I know to mess up your relationship with God!
But what is forgiveness and how do you do it?
The root of the NT word means “release”. Let him or her go. If you’re holding him by the throat to make him pay up, let him go. Let it drop. Like you tell your dog to drop something it’s playing with. Leave it alone. That begins inside your head. Decide to let go of how you feel. Pray blessing on the person who has offended. Pray for God’s forgiveness in their life.
There are at least 5 myths surrounding forgiveness.
Forgiveness means the offence that happened doesn't matter. When I forgive I'm saying "It was nothing, really". Not true! When god forgives me, he says “Gil, it does matter. My Son died for for these sins of yours. But I forgive you.”
Forgiveness can only happen when the other person admits they were wrong or says “sorry”. Not true. Of course, a person who doesn’t admit they were wrong, will not receive your forgiveness. And as a result there will not be a full reconciliation. But you can forgive one another “from the heart.” Forgiveness is a change of attitude to the offender. Reconciliation is behaviour “in which two or more people come together again in mutual trust.” (Psychology Today) So Jesus gets it right again. Forgiveness is a matter of the heart.
Forgiveness means coming back for more of the same. Not true!
Forgiveness is a cruel thing to ask. Not true! What is cruel is to leave the wounds of unforgiveness untreated to fester. We’ve all heard a child screaming in A&E because she has a cut. Then mother gets her quietened down. Then the doctor comes to clean the wound and put in stitches: and the child is screaming again! Who’s being cruel?
Forgiveness is a waste of time because it doesn't undo the harm done. Not true! Of course it doesn’t undo the original harm done. But it does limit the ongoing psychological and spiritual harm. Robert Enright (the father of secular “Forgiveness Therapy”) spoke at 13 events for people who had lost land in property disputes. People said, “Forgiving won’t get my land back”, but he answered, “What would you choose. Not to get your land back and be miserable. Or not to get your land back and be free?” Every time, people chose to live without the debilitating resentment.
So we look again at the teachings in this passage. And we find they are not as random as they at first seem. This is God’s word, and it’s highly relevant because it’s about real life!
v. 1-2. Jesus takes" Stumbling blocks" very seriously, whether the "little ones" referred to are children, or the poorest in society (for whom God has a special concern) or members of the Church family. Actions that harm the last, the lost and the least, or that harm your brothers and sisters, are dangerous actions.
v. 3-4. Jesus talks about someone sinning seven times and being forgiven. That looks like an abuser’s charter. But he also says we are to name the sin for what it is. We re to bring the offence into the open. We are to warn the person concerned about the pain he is causing, the dangers involved in doing what he is doing. (the Greek means warning to prevent something from going wrong) Is he making you or others watching stumble in their faith? What Jesus forbids is the nursing of grudges, or behind-the back criticism of the other person. Bring it out into the open. And we should read this passage alongside others: Mt 7. 3-5 (on the speck in someone else’s eye and the log in your own) and Mt 18. 15-17 (the discipline process which suggests we need a sense of proportion: is this “sin” big enough to get someone thrown out of the Church?) So Jesus is actually expressing concern about keeping relationships healthy, open, honest, and grace-filled, within the Christian community. And along with that, forgiveness that releases, lets go of the offence.
v. 5-6. Faith as small as a mustard seed can move mountains. So if you struggle to forgive, or you struggle to make forgiveness more than an empty gesture or word, ask the Lord for more faith. Make the whole experience of forgiving an expression of faith in Jesus, and an expression of the truth that “I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength!” (Even the secular forgiveness teachers say “Call upon other strengths”) Have faith that the pains with the toughest roots, can be uprooted and thrown into the sea.
v. 7-10. Jesus says, “If your servant (actually a slave) come in from working all day in the field, you don’t thank him and give him his dinner. You say, “wash your hands, put on your bow-tie, and serve up dinner. When I have had my dinner, then you can have some supper.” That seems oppressive, but it’s radical. It addresses the issue of “status” and pride. By being servants, all disciples treat all other disciples as great. All our relationships are defined by service and humility. The parable of the servant is a warning against a book-keeping mentality. We are doing no more that our duty. We are not entitled to extra perks. That sets a background for forgiveness in relationships with one another that are utterly mutual; and in a relationship with god that is utterly submitted. Forgiveness says " Yes Lord". We come in from working the land, change into a clean shirt, and start serving dinner.
Forgiveness as part of the caring accountable and surrendered life of a Christian community, seems like an enormous sacrifice. But the very fact that Jesus puts forgiveness alongside protection of the weak, accountability, faith and surrender, makes it possible and joyful and releasing. According to the medical website WebMD, when you forgive, “you are likely to enjoy lower blood pressure, a stronger immune system, and a drop in the stress hormones circulating in your blood. Back pain, stomach problems, and headaches may disappear. And you’ll reduce the anger, bitterness, resentment, depression, and other negative emotions that accompany the failure to forgive”. But according to Jesus, when you forgive, you’re being like your heavenly Father, who makes his sun shine on the evil and the good. (Mt 5. 45; cf Lk 6. 35f). I'm inviting you to “be merciful, as your heavenly father is merciful.”
© Gilmour Lilly January 2018
